Random thought 1: I have been in Spokane for 4 days now. A lot has happened int hat short amount of time, and yet nothing really significant. I have started working again in the theatre and as an event technician, I have moved into my house for the summer and moved in all of my stuff, and met with many friends in Spokane. I went to see a movie with a friend, went to Dicks for lunch, and have gone to Taco Bell waaaaaay too many times already. I am not sure how, but apparently me being back at work has changed the atmosphere there. It has been said that I brought too much testosterone back into work. Personally, ad the guy who cant really grow facial hair, I don't know what testosterone they are talking about. I spent most of today either running sound for the President of my University, or striking lights and cables from the APs of our theatre. It was a good 95 degrees in Spokane today, so it was really HOT up there in the APs. Something about being 50 feet in the air and looking down to the ground did make me think about what I really want from life.
Random thought 2: I have been telling myself that theatre is what I want from life for so long now, it seems weird to even consider that something else could be a possibility in my life. I did try to think about some other things that I could do with my life, but everything else I like to do I seem to suck at, and everything else I am good at I cant stand doing. Theatre seems to be the only thing that I am good at and enjoy, so that is where I plan on staying. The funny thing is, I actually don't think I am very good at what I do. I just try harder than everyone else, and spend more time and energy getting experience. When it comes to actual talent, I am lacking. In order for me to stay ahead in this world of the theatre, I am going to have to put in way more time and energy to get the same product as more talented people. Fortunately, I believe I have the drive to do so. Experience is easy to come by at a University where I am the only Technical Theatre Major.
Random thought 3: The theme of this next year for me is based of the following question:
"When am I going to be a Senior in college again?"
I am determined to live my life to its fullest for this next year. I have heard too many stories of peoples "could haves" and "would haves" to make the same mistakes. I plan on ending my life with as little regrets as possible, and that starts here and now. I actually have no idea why I started typing this, but the more I type it the more convinced I am that it is true.
Random thought 4: During the Alumni Dinner that I ran sound and tech for tonight, the President of the University announced and talked about his new plans for the school in the future, and the slogan that would take us there. The slogan is "Courage at the Crossroads". The entire dinner he talked about some of the many different ways in which that slogan could be interpreted. His belief was that the crossroads was where the streets of being an academic university and a religious institution met. Nothing was ever really said about why courage was needed at said crossroads. I am going to take a spin on this myself. The way I see it, the crossroad could represent many things in my life right now, but the real point is the courage. The courage is what is needed to walk in the middle of the street. Most of my experience in life has taught me that nothing is in black and white. On one each side of each crossroad in life is an extreme choice. One must find the courage to walk in the street between these extremes. This takes courage in 3 ways, the first of whcih is the courage to get off the sidewalk. The second is the courage to stay in the street. Walking in the middle of the street and away from the sidewalk means sometimes being alone. One must maintain faith that though they appear alone, they are doing what is right for them. The third courage is to get back up. there are many cars on the road of life, and you cannot avoid them all. I have been hit by a few "cars" in my life, and the most important part of walking in the middle of the street of life is to have the courage to get back up and keep walking.
A final note:
Much of what I have written may make absolutely no sense, and if that is the case, please just ignore it. I am not the best writer (Theatre Major... lol) and sometimes struggle to get my thoughts out on paper or screen. Thanks for our patience : )
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